I have to vent. I'm sorry that this blog has just turned into me bitching all the time. I promise I will try to get back to the crazy soon. There is just so much going on that is pissing me off lately and I have no other outlet for my rage. So again I'm sorry.
Last night my husband was talking to his mother on the phone and after he hung up he said
"Did you know what grandma's name was?"
I knew EXACTLY where this bullshit was going because his mother pulled this when I was pregnant with Paddycake.
"Yes", I reply coolly.
"Well mom was just saying how people are using the old fashioned names now." he said.
"Well she needn't worry because I am the one who is suffering with this pregnancy and I will name this child what ever the he&% I want to and NO ONE gets any input. So get it out of your head."

Two days later and I am still fuming over it!

You see if she had ever treated me with an ounce of niceness, I wouldn't be so p.o.'d.

The hubris that she can presume after all these years of snotty comments and general passive-aggressive garbage, to tell me what to name my child enrages me!
Being a Christian I have bent over backwards with these people. I have turned the other cheek so many times that I am out of cheeks to turn. I usually ignore 90% of her crap, but this really galls me. Those links don't even scratch the surface of the garbage I have put up with from the people and usually I just let it go because it's not worth getting upset over.

You know in all actuality the name isn't that bad, I just already have other names picked out. If I was Michelle Dugger and going to have a dozen more the name might even be a contender, but this it, I'm getting my tubes tied because I have just been too sick this time around and I CAN NOT go through this again. God forgive me.

I must rant!

First off, all of you who have been praying for my mom and have been so supportive of me, I want you to know this is NOT about you. I cherish each and every one of you and wish I could see you in person to give you a great big hug and thank you.

When my mom got sick I emailed everyone in my contact list who I knew was a Christian and would pray for her. That list included a distant relative who lives in Tennessee. I now realize that was a GIANT MISTAKE.

Rather than being supportive of our little family, the distant cousin who lives in Tennessee, called another elderly distant cousin(who doesn't have net, therefore didn't get the email) who lives in West Virginia, and told them that my mom was dying with cancer. These two old cows have nothing better to do than to try and stir up trouble.

So this elderly cousin calls our house, and says that TN cousin said that Penny was dying from cancer. She asks how mom is doing and then starts in about our late aunt's estate. Did we get anything? NO. Have we talked to her husband? NO. And other assorted crap that we just don't want to be bothered with. * Did she ask if there was anything she could do? NO. Did she say she would offer prayer? NO. Did she keep her conversation short and sweet so that my mom would not get tired out? NO- she kept mom on the phone for 86 minutes.

OK now for those of you out there keeping score, you know my mother has cancer, but she is not dying yet. Her doctors tell us that they fully believe she will make a full recovery and they are treating her with a curative intent.

I am just LIVID! Anybody with half a brain should have the good sense not to call somebody and just blurt out-Barb said you were dying? You know it really shows me Satan in action. I am working so HARD to improve myself and my relationship with the Lord by being kind and forgiving.
I have always been a Christian but I am human. Simply by being human, we are all sinners, we all have issues. Anger is my biggest one.

Last week Deanna wrote about anger and how it affected her relationship with her sons.
She included James 1:19-20 and it hit me like a hammer. Oh how I needed that verse!
I have a horrible temper, and fly off the handle quite often.
I am horrid when I get behind the wheel, I am not kind to fellow drivers. I call them every name in the book and in general just spread ill-will. I have often joked about buying a tank so that I could just push people out of my way-if that gives you any idea of my road rage.

So I am working on controlling these things in order to be closer to God. The harder I work on myself the more people keep coming at me with pettiness, gossip and just in general trying my patience. The call today really felt like an attack from Satan.

So I have to forgive this person and I will pray for her. That is the right thing to do.










*the 411 about my aunt is not pretty-she died exactly one month after a "fall" on Christmas day 2005. I put "fall" in quotes because some information has come to light about her husband that leads me to look at her fall's in a new suspicious light. The woman was not clumsy. I don't know why I didn't see it at the time. Her husband didn't call us when she died, I only learned about it from an email the day of the visitation when it was too late to get there. We barely made it to the funeral. Her husband didn't speak to us at all. He also didn't file her will, and instead told everyone she didn't have one, so he could keep everything for himself. We could probably sue, but we won't. He is an evil man and when he dies, he will only have my aunt's hard-earned money to bid him farewell. He alienates people for sport. There is so much more that I could write about but I won't. I only want to be a positive light in the world. For me taking him to court, and dredging up the past would not be positive.

Historic ‘name trees’ bore thousands of carvings

This is particularly poignant in light of the fact that we just passed the 64Th Anniversary of D-Day, and that World War II veterans are dying off everyday.
My grand-daddy( a WWII vet of the Pacific Theatre) always said they would be speaking German if we hadn't saved their sorry butts. This is such a shame. Go read!

From the Timesonline.com
"The names “Thomas and Dorothy” were carved in the bark of one trunk. Another said “Bob and Carma”. Other trees were marked with soldiers’ home states - Iowa, Maine or Alabama - and several bore hearts and the names or initials of a wife or girlfriend.
The beech trees of Saint Pierre de Varengeville-Duclair forest bore a poignant testimony to the D-Day landings for more than six decades.."

NO GOOD DEED GOES UNPUNISHED!!!!

I am so P.O.'d right now I could effin scream!!!!
OK, so here is the deal, my MIL (think Marie Barone and the mil from the book Vinegar Hill-very whiny & helpless acting) had surgery for a uterine tumor on Friday, complete hysterectomy. This was done by making a gash in her abdomen of about six or eight inches-like a C-Section for those who have had one.
She was released from the hospital on Sunday. For Sunday dinner they had TV dinners. So yesterday I went to Your Secret Chef and picked up a glazed chicken breast with rice dinner for them. Knowing that this would be healthier for them than a sodium laden TV dinner or whatever crap they usually eat. They don't eat healthy at all, and my MIL is diabetic with heart issues and FIL is also a heart patient. A lot of times for dinner my FIL will eat bologna and crackers(and its not a money issue either). YEAH.
So I had the hubs drop off the chicken and rice dish. Well come to find out that my FIL WON'T eat rice. NOT, THANK YOU for thinking of us, but 'Charles won't eat rice'.
I had ordered several meals for them that I was picking up this afternoon, and you guessed two of them had rice and the other had noodles, another food Charles won't eat.
So you know what, I kept the food that I picked up for them. We will eat it ourselves. I am tired to death of bending over backwards for these damn people to have them be so damn hateful to me for 15 damn years!!! This isn't the first time I have been treated this way.
You know when I had my C-section back when my son was born, I would have been thrilled out of my mind if someone had taken the time to think of me and bring us a meal. It was a hard surgery and a long recovery. I could barely walk, so I know she is in the same kind of shape.
I just don't get these people.
Nothing is ever good enough. Why couldn't they just be gracious and say "Thank you"?